Hey, y’all. It’s that final, sometimes-agonizing last stretch to the weekend. Let’s cheer each other to the finish line, mmkay?
Right now, I’m watching my twins tear up the living room, ripping up Uno cards, repeatedly pressing the countdown timer on the Catchphrase, and sticking plastic spoons into Dad’s stationary bike spokes. I’m ignoring the chaos — for my sanity. As long as they’re alive, right? I’m kidding. They’re fine.
(Image via Know Your Meme)
As we hanglide — or crawl, depending on the kind of week you’ve had — into Friday, let me take this opportunity to share a few little tidbits that I’ve unearthed this week, or: everything you didn’t know you needed on this merciless Thursday. Like: scented stamps, a new Netflix binge, and news articles that don’t actually make you want to gouge your eyes out with a #2. What can I say except you’re welcome? (#MoanaFTW)
- SCENTED STAMPS. Like, can you even?? First, let me say that I am a self-proclaimed (but literally everyone would attest to it) papyrophiliac. I relentlessly hoard stationary, notebooks, paper products, journals, writing utensils, bookcase-filling tomes on paper and writing, and of course, stamps. Do I preorder stamps from the USPS website? Yes, okay. I’ll admit to that. Do I have the Rifle Paper ones? Several sheets. The Mr. Rogers ones? BUT OF COURSE. So naturally, when I was casually browsing the USPS website, you know, for funsies, I saw: Frozen Treats: “The stamps are printed with a coating that that evokes a sweet, summer scent.” !!!!! What ever happened to the glory days of scratch-n-sniff stickers, anyway? Check out my Amazon search history and you will see that I’ve been searching for some of those suckers for YEARS. Hello, 1990s we are back!! *cue my 9-year-old self squealing* I’m about to send some deliciously-scented mail this summer, y’all. (And speaking of papyrophilia, I’ve just finished stalking every and all photos from the National Stationary Show on social media, and you should totally check out these adorable new hidden message cards from Paper Bandit Press they debuted there. I’ve already bought a handful. Plus, the business owners are amazing. I interviewed them in my heyday as a writer for the Brigham Young University business school, so click if you want to read the story and daydream about vintage letterpresses. I mean, who wouldn’t??)
- Target x Museum of Ice Cream. Like, I needed another reason to heart Target. As if. I would give that store my first born baby (technically that would be Nate, by two minutes. Nice knowing you, Naters! Bye!) You know how people have a rush of endorphins when they eat chocolate or exercise? That is me entering any Target store. Seriously. It’s the Mama B Motherland. You can find me here taking wide-aisle-turns in my red double-wide any day of the week. In fact, let me share a masterpiece. This is an abstract piece I like to call Twins at Target: Beautiful, isn’t it? Anyway, in my eyes, Target can do no wrong. Including this their latest collab with the Museum of Ice Cream. And not to be #HipsterKasee, but I totally followed the MoIC from the beginning. But because I’m not Beyonce or living in a hip metropolis (I mean, I’m pretty sure all we care about here in Austin is City Limits and BBQ), I’ve never gotten the chance to synchronize swim in a pool of multi-colored sprinkles or get an underdog on a banana swing. Truly, a tragedy. But at least this way, I can combine two loves into one buy-more-than-I-need Target trip. In July, Target freezer’s will be stocked with MoIC-inspired pints, like Nana Banana, Cherrylicious, Chocolate Crush, Churro Churro and Vanillionaire, plus the Museum of Ice Cream’s classic flavors, Piñata and Sprinkle Pool. I’ll take 5,000 plz.
- Call the Midwife. Any other CTM fans out there? Seriously, I had been SLEEPING on this show! I mean, you wouldn’t have caught me watching this show while I was pregnant (heelllllooo nightmares), but wow. I’m obsessed. Talk to me about writing and you’ll know the #1 thing I love about my favorite books (and what I desperately try to accomplish in my own work) is strong character development. You know, characters you want to get a Slurpee and talk for hours with. Or, I suppose in the case of Call the Midwife, it would be a slice of cake — but I digress. CTM has characters that I just fell in love with, characters who have depth and richness, characters that I want to be BFFs with. #ChummyFanClub. Plus, it gives me all the feels. If you need something to spend a weekend on, choose Call the Midwife. Binge it. And then you can send me an edible arrangement out of gratitude.
- The Jet Lag Mask. In one of life’s unfair gotchas, my hair knows it’s in Texas (can you say humidity perm??), but my skin does not. It gets unforgivingly dry, making it look like I’m evilly molting a new skin every few weeks. Gross. But finally I gave into the hype of this cream like a true bandwagoner and have loveloveloved it. I use it a few nights a week in dime-sized amounts (because uhhh $48??? *cue flying money emoji*) and it helps my skin stay more moisturized and not look so snake-like. I mean, if I’m going to look like an animal, shouldn’t it be something cute? #OtterFace. Infomercial over.
- Unnecessary Thing I Want to Buy For My Twins #38833423489: This Bigfoot Stuffie. *initiates annoying baby voice mode* awwwwwww would you just wook at how cute a widdle sasquatch <3 <3 <3. Okay, phew. Me again. But c’mon. ALL THE HEART EYES. Better just click “Add to Cart.” You know. For later. (And let’s be real. It wouldn’t be for my twins. It’d be for me. #NoRegrets).
Well, now my twins have found the diapers and are throwing them around like confetti. Better go.